Sunday, March 29, 2009

Leaving Leisureville

How does one sum up the experience of living in a retirement community? If I had the time I could write a book. I think that I would title it Leaving Leisureville: The Ancient Art of Being Ancient.

First there is the reality of living with a couple thousand people that are your parents' age. Which means you are living with couple thousand people that think they are your parents? The ones that don't, think they might have the chance to be your Daddy. My favorite experience was going to Barnes & Noble & sharing my table with two single seniors. While one is asking you questions about where you are from & your experiences; the other one is asking you to sit on your lap- and then they switch the good cop/naughty cop routine. This lead my mother to ask me everytime that I got home wiether I met any Sugar Daddies or not. Sugar Daddies are now pictured in my mind as men asking you weither the WiFi comes through the electrical outlet or not.

Then there are the interests of retirees. I never could get myself to go to the Hymn Sing-a-long but I have improved my Shuffleboard game. Here's an example of the oddites of Leisureville. This is my first and probably last Confederate jig-saw puzzle that I'll ever complete.

I came down to Florida without any warm weather clothing (remember 3 years in AK). So I had to purchase some new clothes. Florida clothing is designed for women with a different sauce than I'm into. This faux tropical ideal the New Yorkers think they are living in instead of a sprawling chain of Walgreens. And then capris! I HATE CAPRIS! How have women been conviced that men like clothing like capris that make your ass look fat & so unflatteringly expose your veiny ankles? So I took a note from my mother. Her in her fabulous golfing outfit going to the links. (Yes, it does have golf carts on it.)
So I bought pants with cupcakes on my keester. Pink! My Mum bought me a pair of matching pink fli-flops. I liked them soo much that I did a journal page dedicated to my "Winky Shoes."

The bonus of being in Leisureville was that I got to be with parents. Working out with my Dad seeing him return to health. I'm really fortunate to have this time. And if you have to be unemployed, be unemployed on the beach:)

Miss you more than "Winky Shoes", V